MAMA FORGIVE ME
This poem is dedicated to my late mum, Happiness Osigwe. Although I didn’t spend much time with my parents, but I could feel their love in my veins.
(For the only woman that has continued to live in my heart. “Spoken Word”)
She was sick,
But always smiling
She never wants to see her son cry.
I was seriously making her,
Never knew, it was her last.
We both sat together that very day, echoing laughter.
And then suddenly, she held her chest;
Battling with her, unseen friends or foes.
Her smile was still hanging on her face.
Her eyes sank in mine,
As she stretched out her hand
Trying to touch my face, and felt my warm sink
Like she was blind;
And then she smiled again
And separated her lips to speak,
but words could not scale through
So, she left her last precious breath in my cold palms.
Maybe, she wanted to tell me, that she loves me.
As I was drowning in my thought
Fighting so hard, to plant meaning into what I felt;
That she wanted to say.
The world began to scream in my head.
Too loud that I held my head tight,
like it was falling off.
Then tears dribble down my eyes.
She will no longer tell me,
What’s good, wrong or even odd.
I remember when she taught me how to love.
How to exchange warm smile at everyone,
Not just a being,
I cried.
Mother, was never putting on anything good.
I mean, fantasy.
But, when she slept as a child,
Who knows nothing about being alive.
Everyone suddenly became rich,
Ready to plant money.
Side by Side with her, in her grave.
She no longer look like the woman I used to know.
That tattered mother
that has been labeled “Out Of Fashion.”
Her new room was calmly carved,
Beautifully made.
Everyone went shaking hands with my uncle,
because gongs echoed loud at her departure.
And so, I hate it, when one suddenly becomes an uncle.
When death makes one blind,
And when death is still knocking at the door of a widow
With her only-innocent son
Who knows not how to merge alphabets, or count numbers.
And now, I imagined when God
Hasn’t picked us all,
from our different moulds
to become humans. Centuries ago.
And I wondered if God ever once said,
“Angel Gabriel.
Those moulds over there, are for suffering women.
While the other;
For dangerous uncle’s”
Because uncle kept smiling all day,
Like his wish finally came through.
Some weeks after the interment.
He came, with his shoulders high
And all he said was
“Benjamin!
That land is no longer yours.
As you can see, am still alive
and my children needs to survive”
He said those words, like I was going to die soon.
I cried more than a thousand times;
scratching off my healing scars.
But still, I owe mother
All apologies un-behalf of I and father
For not being there, when she needed us the most.
Father died when I was born,
and I was not a man to fight back.
Kneeling beside her grave, I said
“Mother, it’s still your son
Please forgive me.
I didn’t wish to see you die
Like you never wanted to see me cry,
But sometimes
We are left to lick our wounds.
I LOVE YOU ALWAYS.
Osigwe Benjamin
I wish they were still alive to see their son grow tall.
This poem is dedicated to my late mum, Happiness Osigwe. Although I didn’t spend much time with my parents, but I could feel their love in my veins.
(For the only woman that has continued to live in my heart. “Spoken Word”)
She was sick,
But always smiling
She never wants to see her son cry.
I was seriously making her,
Never knew, it was her last.
We both sat together that very day, echoing laughter.
And then suddenly, she held her chest;
Battling with her, unseen friends or foes.
Her smile was still hanging on her face.
Her eyes sank in mine,
As she stretched out her hand
Trying to touch my face, and felt my warm sink
Like she was blind;
And then she smiled again
And separated her lips to speak,
but words could not scale through
So, she left her last precious breath in my cold palms.
Maybe, she wanted to tell me, that she loves me.
As I was drowning in my thought
Fighting so hard, to plant meaning into what I felt;
That she wanted to say.
The world began to scream in my head.
Too loud that I held my head tight,
like it was falling off.
Then tears dribble down my eyes.
She will no longer tell me,
What’s good, wrong or even odd.
I remember when she taught me how to love.
How to exchange warm smile at everyone,
Not just a being,
I cried.
Mother, was never putting on anything good.
I mean, fantasy.
But, when she slept as a child,
Who knows nothing about being alive.
Everyone suddenly became rich,
Ready to plant money.
Side by Side with her, in her grave.
She no longer look like the woman I used to know.
That tattered mother
that has been labeled “Out Of Fashion.”
Her new room was calmly carved,
Beautifully made.
Everyone went shaking hands with my uncle,
because gongs echoed loud at her departure.
And so, I hate it, when one suddenly becomes an uncle.
When death makes one blind,
And when death is still knocking at the door of a widow
With her only-innocent son
Who knows not how to merge alphabets, or count numbers.
And now, I imagined when God
Hasn’t picked us all,
from our different moulds
to become humans. Centuries ago.
And I wondered if God ever once said,
“Angel Gabriel.
Those moulds over there, are for suffering women.
While the other;
For dangerous uncle’s”
Because uncle kept smiling all day,
Like his wish finally came through.
Some weeks after the interment.
He came, with his shoulders high
And all he said was
“Benjamin!
That land is no longer yours.
As you can see, am still alive
and my children needs to survive”
He said those words, like I was going to die soon.
I cried more than a thousand times;
scratching off my healing scars.
But still, I owe mother
All apologies un-behalf of I and father
For not being there, when she needed us the most.
Father died when I was born,
and I was not a man to fight back.
Kneeling beside her grave, I said
“Mother, it’s still your son
Please forgive me.
I didn’t wish to see you die
Like you never wanted to see me cry,
But sometimes
We are left to lick our wounds.
I LOVE YOU ALWAYS.
Osigwe Benjamin
I wish they were still alive to see their son grow tall.
Osigwe is a poet who believes in the Power of Words
.
He has performed on different stages/platforms in Nigeria, and was among the EGC TOP 50 CONTEMPORARY POETS WHO ROCKED NIGERIA in year 2015.
